Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Sweet Moments

I just had the sweetest half an hour right now with the babies. This afternoon they were quite cranky, as I think they've both started to get runny noses (if they get sick, this will be the third time in their young lives, and EVERY time it has been within 3 days of being in the church nursery! UGH!). I was having a particularly patient day for some reason and didn't get overwhelmed by it as I often do. I brought them upstairs for bath time and for the first time I put them directly in the tub (I've been using a baby tub inside the big tub). Kenna did great, sitting still for me the whole time. Nathan wanted to crawl everywhere and it was a much bigger challenge. But, I guess it's time to do it. So anyway, because I was feeling particularly peaceful and nurturing despite all this, I decided that I was going to rock Kenna and sing to her because she had been so upset all afternoon and I thought she wasn't feeling well. Now, that might sound like a typical thing to do with babies, but it's not for us for a couple of reasons:

1) I sing to them a lot, but more like fun songs during the day, and never "lullaby" types of songs. I don't have a very good voice so I guess I have always felt funny singing in any kind of serious way.

2) I decided in the very beginning that I would always put the babies down awake, rather than rock them to sleep. I read in several books that this is best for their sleep habits in the long run and decided to follow through with it. Consequently, I have never once actually rocked Nathan or Kenna to sleep!

So back to tonight. I took Kenna and sat in the rocking chair with her facing me and her face over my shoulder. I started rocking and singing some of my favorite slow hymns from church. In the meantime, Nathan was standing in the crib, just watching this all unfold (but listening quietly!). She was so still, just melted in my arms. I just kept singing and singing and rocking, and enjoyed it so much...suddenly I looked down and Kenna was sound asleep with her little hand clutching my shoulder still. It was such a precious moment. I couldn't believe MY singing had been soothing enough to put her to sleep. I felt so motherly. :) I went and put her in the crib and then picked up Nathan. Nathan is such a squiggler, I thought for sure I wouldn't go two for two. I started rocking and singing and sure enough he was trying to crawl away. So instead I stood up and held him, swaying back and forth. Kenna had woken up when I put her down and was looking at me. I started singing the same songs again and as soon as I did, she closed her eyes and went to sleep. It was SO sweet. Then, the amazing happened, and Nathan became like jelly in my arms while I sang even though he didn't seem tired 3 minutes before. I sang for a while and put him down in the crib. He wasn't asleep but was all glazed over. Normally Nathan screams as soon as he is put in the crib, but he just laid there on his back looking up at me quietly. I started singing again and rubbing his head gently. He closed his eyes so peacefully and drifted off to sleep while I rubbed his head. You have to know Nathan to understand why that's crazy. He has a tough time going to sleep and always fights it, always goes on his stomach, and always tosses and turns for a while. The fact that I actually was able to "soothe" him to sleep amazed me. I left the room with my two sweet angels peacefully drifting off. It was a very, very sweet moment.

I still believe in putting babies down awake, but now that they know the routine and do go to sleep on their own every day, I think it will be nice to do some rocking once in a while. :)

Monday, September 14, 2009

Pictures!

(Update below this post)

Happy Kenna:



Happy Nathan:




Unhappy Nathan(this face cracks me up):



Unhappy Kenna:



Grammy took this pic on a trip to Costco - I just love how Kenna is reaching out to Nathan!



Nathan's first time ever standing up in his crib:









9 Months Old!

I can't believe it's true, but the babies just turned nine months old! That used to seem like such a far off thing, it's hard to imagine we are here. I honestly feel like I'm living someone else's life sometimes lately. Remember how I used to post about how I couldn't see myself as a mom with a newborn because when I always thought about having kids, I pictured older kids (like toddlers)? Well, recently my babies have truly seemed more like toddlers than like little babies. And for the first time I find myself as a mom in the way I had always thought of it. I had no expectations of what it would be like to have a newborn because I had never been around them. I had to create that reality as I went. But I certainly had imagined what it would be like to have older kids and I'm starting to live in that world now as they become more like "pre-toddlers". I regularly find myself taking a step back and realizing how crazy it is that I'm a mom now...a mom as I had always thought of that experience. It's really crazy, and a real transition for me. The babies are both pulling to standing now (more on that in a minute) and when I turned around yesterday to see them both standing up at a table looking at me it was truly an eye opener. I just couldn't believe I am their MOM...I'm a mom?! I'm having those realizations of "I can't believe this has all come true for us" all over again. I can't believe our dreams came true after so much difficulty. I thank God for that every day. What an amazing answer to prayers we had through J. Every ounce of difficulty was worth it now that they are here.

I also feel much more comfortable in my "role" as mom now. In the beginning I felt slightly fraudulent because I was a mom who didn't go through pregnancy like almost everyone else. I felt like somehow I wasn't as good as everyone else. Part of that was driven by all the questions you get with newborns from strangers - how fast I lost the weight, did I have a csection, I can't believe you carried two babies, etc. It was a constant reminder that I was different. But once the babies got older, the pregnancy questions just stopped coming about and now I truly feel like a "regular" mom without the inferiority complex. In fact, I have no problem telling people I didn't carry and I feel fine about it. I don't feel that little gut pinch I did in the beginning. I'm very grateful for that!

So, let's see what is new...

1) Nathan now has six teeth...his two teeth on top on the sides of the front two finally broke through last week. He was CRANKY CRANKY CRANKY for a couple of weeks before that so I was relieved to see that's what it was when they finally came through!

2) On Sept 4, just a few days before his nine month bday, I walked into the nursery in the morning to get the babies ready for a weekend away and there was Nathan STANDING in his crib!! I dashed downstairs for the camera and made it back in time to take a picture (I'll post after this).

He was looking at me like, "what? what's all the fuss about?" He looked like such a big kid!

This morning, not to be outdone, KENNA then stood up in her crib for the first time when I came in to get them first thing! I again ran for the camera and made it back in time again!

Since last week Nathan has been standing up on EVERYTHING. He is a standing machine. Against walls, gates, tables, you name it. He hasn't started to cruise yet but it won't be long. Kenna can actually stand a few seconds without holding onto anything. I think because she is lighter she has better balance than Nathan!

3) Kenna got her ears pierced Saturday! Oh man, it made me feel bad. She SCREAMED...but then it was over 5 minutes later and she was fine again. She is too cute with her little earings!

4) Kenna is still doing the army crawl even though she can stand. I'm thinking she might just skip normal crawling! She does do an intermediate position where she's up on her needs when at "rest position", but goes back to army crawl to get somewhere. When we were on vacation over labor day she took a few regular crawls in our condo where we were staying but I haven't seen anything like it since!

5) Kenna continues to babble constantly, and Nathan is still just doing it a little. I've heard him do mama, baba and dada...it's just not very often!

6) They discontinued the formula we had worked so hard to find early on (lactose free for Nathan). :( Big bummer. I've been giving him a low lactose formula instead and I think he's been having a lot of tummy aches because of it. Today I tried a new one without lactose and it seems that he has been a lot happier suddenly. Poor guy, I think he's really been struggling. Hopefully this new one will solve the problem.

7) Nathan is about 22 pounds and Kenna is about 20 pounds. (Both just under those numbers).

8) Baby food making is going well and they are eating just about everything well! Nathan doesn't like green beans very much but other than that they have really gotten better about vegetables. I got a better blender and the smooth consistency has made all the difference in the world.

9) Kenna waves a lot but not really in response to you waving! It's so cute when she does it but she doesn't realize she should do it when YOU do it. She just likes to wave in general. :) And say MAMAMAMAMAMA really loudly. In public. lol Nathan has started clapping his hands periodically when is really cute too. He gets a huge smile on his face!

10) We've been really working on "NO". They know it's not a good thing for sure, as they get upset by it. When they spit out food they get a firm hand squeeze and serious look with a "NO SPIT" from me. Other things get the hand squeeze and "NO TOUCH". Or "NOT A TOY". Kenna actually listens very well! Nathan not so much. But after not listening they get removed completely from what they are wanting to do. They are definitely starting to understanding. Starting being the key word. :)

11) Nathan finally has high chair manners! For a while he complained between every bite with whining because he wanted it faster and for Kenna to not have hers. Every time he started crying I turned his high chair away. He would then scream for a while and I wouldn't turn him around until he stopped. After about a week of this he stopped doing it completely. Victory! (most of the time ;)

12) I haven't blogged much about this, but I'm working on teaching them French at the same time as English (as much as possible given that I'm only intermediate level and not fluent). I do half days with them where we play only in French and label objects in French etc. Even Bryan has commited to this and just started Rosetta Stone! I'm so proud of him...he's not too interested in languages to start with, and it's not exactly his forte (by his own admission) so I couldn't be more thrilled that he is supporting this endeavor that is so important to me.

13) Our ten year anniversary is next week! We are going to Yosemite and are looking forward to having some time as a couple, thanks to Bryan's parents having the kids for the weekend. They have been SO instrumental in our sanity as parents. They actually have their own (beautiful) nursery for the twins set up at their house, so they are basically prepared to have them at any time. How amazing is that? They have all kinds of toys, baby gates, everything needed. They have been so willing to have them, and to come to our house to watch them too. Bryan's mom comes every Tuesday afternoon to care for them while I get work done. They have had them for several overnights when we have had the chance to get away and when I had to leave town for work. It's a huge blessing for us and for the babies! My own parents will be coming to visit in just a couple of weeks...they live out of state unfortunately so they haven't been able to be involved in the same way with the babies. It makes me sad that they can't be here, as I know they would love to be, but I'm so glad they are getting to come visit. They are beside themselves with excitement!

Well, I will try to get some pictures up now. I haven't posted any in a while! Time for them to show their faces. :)